When it comes to sex, your fantasies may not always align with your reality. For many people, the idea of speaking about their deepest sexual desires, or asking their partner to try something a little more adventurous can be daunting. There’s the worry that they won’t be into it or, worse still, might feel criticised for their sexual performance.
But if you’re in a loving relationship, chances are your partner will be only too happy to go on a sexual adventure with you. And one of the easiest ways to introduce something new into your lovemaking is with sex toys.
Introducing sex toys can be a playful way to open up a dialogue about your wants and desires in a soft, non-confrontational manner. We recommend starting small. Try lube first, or massage oil—something that can open you and your partner up to the idea of being more playful in your sex life.
Then you might think about adding in a bullet vibrator. They are great for stimulating the clitoris as you have penetrative sex. Something small and easy to operate like the Lereve vibrating bullet is ideal. It is waterproof and discreet with a simple 1-touch button. Keep it in your bedside table so that it is always close to hand and you don’t have to ruin the moment to look for it in your wardrobe, which is always somewhat of a mood killer.
Buy a pair of satin restraints and take turns tying each other up, maybe with a blindfold (see our More Than 50 Shades hamper) to see how it feels to deprive one of the senses. Set up some rules so you feel safe and there are no unexpected surprises—like you can only use your mouths to explore each other. Get rid of any expectations and just see what happens.
If you feel comfortable try talking dirty to each other. However, don’t feel pressured into being more adventurous than you want to be. State your boundaries and remember you always have the right to say no. Consensual sex is about as erotic as it gets.
Finally, make sure you get a good toy disinfectant so you can keep your toys clean and ready for next time.